An Italian gentleman friend has promised to take her out for an ice cream, and she likes nothing better than to spend the evening licking the nuts off a large Neapolitan. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. These days, we only really know Colin for his work at the piano, but as a young lad he cut his teeth on the harmonica until his teacher explained that he wasn't supposed to chew it. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue is greatest radio comedy, says panel ", "You know, I was interested to learn recently that Colin doesn't just play the piano, in fact I have a letter here that says he's recently become very handy on the sax and that's signed by the Haringey Council Waste Disposal Department. ", "As the frisky tomcat of fate confronts the scalpel of destiny, and the precious natural woodland of time meets the motorway extension of eternity", "As the Ford Anglia of time fails the MOT test of eternity, and the dappled donkey of fate ambles toward the abbetoir of destiny", "Well as the delicate mayfly of time collides with the speeding windscreen of fate, and the angry wasp of destiny flies up the trouser leg of despair", "As the loose boweled pigeon to time swoops low over the tourist of destiny, and the unlicensed mini-cab of fate gets lost in the one-way system of eternity", "As the short-sighted rhino of time attempts to mount the VW beetle of eternity, and the rubber glove of hope gets lost in the Aberdeen Angus of destiny", "As the great tit of time nibbles through the gold top of eternity, and the unseen mouse droppings of fate nestle in the Crunchy Fruit and Nut muesli of destiny", "As the rogue purple underpants of time begin their assault on the whites-only wash cycle of destiny, and the twin buttocks of fate are sucked into the malfunctioning chemical toilet of eternity", "As the armpit hair of time is snagged in the ball deodorant of destiny, and the Harpic of eternity spills unseen onto the loo roll of fate", "As the red red robin of time goes bob-bob-bobbing under the snow plough of destiny, and the sage and onion stuffing mixture of fate is rammed up the eternally unfrozen turkey of damnation", "As the grubby raincoat of time opens to reveal the upright Member of Parliament, and the categorical denial of destiny is swiftly followed by the resignation letter of fate", "As the wee-willy-winky of time pops out of the nightgown of eternity", "As the chill wind of time blows up the kilt of destiny, and the short-sighted octopus of fate attempts to mount the bagpipes of eternity", "As the little Jack Horner of time pulls out his plums of fate, and the little Tommy Tucker of destiny looks for a rhyme we can broadcast", "As the plastic cup of time fails to emerge from the vending machine of destiny, and the scalding coffee substitute of fate splashes onto the unsuspecting crotch of eternity", "As the false teeth of time come away in the Granny Smith of destiny, and the Grandpa Smith of fate decides he needs stronger dentifix", "As the 4x4 of destiny on the level crossing of fate, stalls in the path of the speeding freight train of doom, and the signalman of time rushes to fetch his camera", "As the hunter of time blasts the moose of destiny, and as the dairy counter worker of fate grabs the mop of destiny", "Lionel Blair & Christopher Biggins recently appeared on Stars in Their Eyes, where Lionel singing Maggie May came second to his old teammate. That went off very well. Then, Samantha says, she likes to watch as he rips the paper strips and wax off for her", "It just occurred to me that Samantha hasn't given us the scoressince 1981. Dee went on to host all episodes of the 52nd series later that year, and has continued in that role to the present. Apparently, they've been working on the restoration of an old chest of drawers. Here's some of her excuses for leaving early: **Important** - A warning about a new book about Humphrey Lyttelton. We would like to go on and ask you a few things about what you're doing currently, Sir Alec, but we do have to hurry on to the next game. The programme has won the Gold Sony Radio Comedy Award three times: In 2020 the programme was voted the greatest radio comedy of all time by a panel convened by Radio Times.[47]. ", (After Jeremy Hardy has sung in a round of Pick up Song) "That wasn't even the same track. The supposed personalities of the panellists as demonstrated by the chairman, fictitious but drawn from their public personas, is also a recurring theme. Many come here and pay a few pounds to enjoy an uninterrupted 45 minute viewing of London and the Thames as they wait for their Connex train to finally crawl off Hungerford Bridge. ", Tim Brooke-Taylor: "We're Running a Bit Low on Mohicans. For example, in a round based on suggesting television programmes from biblical times: In "Uxbridge English Dictionary" the panellists contribute humorous redefinitions of words; "Puny: the Roman Catholic equivalent of tennis elbow". The show recommenced on 15 June 2009 with Lyttelton being replaced by a trio of hosts serving in tandem: Stephen Fry, Jack Dee and Rob Brydon. Humphrey Lyttelton: Well, I'm afraid it doesn't look as if Samantha's going to be able to make it for this half of the evening at least. The show launched in April 1972 as a parody of radio and TV more More I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue quotes Collection Edit Buy Humphrey Lyttelton: Most of the humour is detached from the real world. Chortle. Samantha goes and I go too. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Shes the figure who exists purely as a device for the hosts to make a string of uncomfortable innuendoes about women. Eventually, the nuns of Beverley convent rose in revolt, and laid seige to Hull. [23] Jeremy Hardy also ruled himself out, saying "Humph had big shoes to fill and I wouldn't do it."[24]. He seems sure she's gonna make it big. Difficult. "Dear Mr. Rees, I understand you're looking for suggestions for your 'Quote, Unquote' programme. Although there are twelve Clue shows broadcast per year these are the result of just six recording sessions, with two programmes being recorded back-to-back. He did occasionally depart from the script, however, often bringing the house down with an ad-lib. [54], The show's panel (including guest panellist, List of games on I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue, "I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue panel game to return to Radio 4", "Millions haven't a clue what they'll do without Humph", "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Mailout 17.10.08", "History of I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, the official website of ISIHAC or Clue with Jack Dee, Rob Brydon, Graeme Garden, Tim Brooke-Taylor and Humphrey Lyttleton", "Iain Pattinson at Amanda Howard Associates", "Tributes paid to comedy writer Iain Pattinson following his death aged 68", "Interview with Graeme Garden, Tim Brooke-Taylor and Barry Cryer", "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Mailout 18.4.08", "He was the hub of the show, the urbane man surrounded by idiots", "Humphrey Lyttelton delivers swansong with giant kazoo band", "I'm sorry, we haven't a clue: Who will replace Humphrey Lyttelton? The Crossword Solver finds answers to classic crosswords and cryptic crossword puzzles. But it really pushed boat out with its two incredibly camp resting-actor characters, Julian and Sandy, played by Kenneth Williams and Hugh Paddick. Status. Episodes being played now. She doesn't know much about racing, but she's already seen something to admire in his jockeys. Incidentally, we were all surprised to hear that Colin has recently been standing in for Oasis. She says she can't wait to get home and handle her new Phillips upright. This is a well-established concept, requiring explanation only to anyone who's slept through every show for the last thirty-five years. So I'll be interested to read this. Read about our approach to external linking. So that's answered your next question". [33] For example: "When music experts hear Colin's compositions, they say he could have been another Berlin, Porter or anybody else employed by the German State Railway." [15] In the first series Lyttelton shared the role of chairman with Barry Cryer[2] but he made it his own (especially once Cryer replaced Cleese as a regular panellist) and continued as chairman until his death on 25 April 2008. The show launched in April 1972 as a parody of radio and TV panel games, and has been broadcast since on BBC Radio 4 and the BBC World Service, with repeats aired on BBC Radio 4 Extra and, in the 1980s and 1990s, on BBC Radio 2. ", [Lyttelton discusses the "eleven jokes in the world"; i.e., the 11 types of humour. [13] Both Judi Dench and Alan Titchmarsh took part in "Celebrity What's My Line?". "Dear Mr Titchmarsh: This morning I went out to dig up some dandelions and a giant hogweed on my lawn. In fact, I have a cutting here from Jazz Monthly magazine, written by their top reviewer. An Italian gentleman friend has promised to take her out for an ice-cream, and she likes nothing better than to spend an evening licking the nuts off a large Neapolitan." [26] The programme returned on 15 June 2009, chaired by Fry with the usual panellists and special guest Victoria Wood. 'Risky, rude, brilliantly written and superbly performed' The Judges, Sony Radio Academy Award This second treasury contains over 30 hilarious editions of the award-winning 'antidote to panel games', first published as I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue Volumes 10 to 15, I'm Sorry I Haven't a . And with that, as the late, great Humphrey Lyttleton once said: "As the great tit of time nibbles through the gold top of eternity, and the unseen mouse droppings of fate nestle in the Crunchy Fruit and Nut muesli of destiny"I bid you farewell. I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue: Volume 14 [Audio] von BBC 1 von 1 Nur 1 brig Siehe Mehr. Monday 20 March 2023 Swansea Arena (Bremner, Tuesday 21 March 2023 Princess Theatre, Torquay (Bremner, Culshaw, Evans and Jones), Saturday 25 March 2023 Birmingham Hippodrome (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Jones), Sunday 26 March 2023 New Wimbledon Theatre (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Jones), Monday 27 March 2023 The Marlowe Theatre, Canterbury (Bremner, Brigstocke, Evans and Jones), This page was last edited on 28 March 2023, at 12:59. 2. Your email address will be added to our mailing list database, which will ensure that you are the first to hear about all BBC ISIHAC recording dates as well as touring shows. The show at the Lowry in Salford was filmed and broadcast on BBC Four on 13 September 2008. [36], On one occasion Humph announced that they had a very distinguished actor as a guest who would join in the game of Mornington Crescent. EUR 12,55 Sofort-Kaufen, EUR 11,86 Versand, 30-Tag Rcknahmen, eBay-Kuferschutz. Humphrey Lyttelton: Incidentally, you may be interested to know that Colin's musical influences are, in fact, Middle Eastern in origin. Ballykissangel. Samantha's just started keeping bees herself and has three dozen or so, and she says her friend's an expert handler. Racing the express train from London, he won by a full eleven minutes. She says she doesn't mind looking up and seeing him hung like a baboon. Barry Cryer was often represented as a tight-fisted alcoholic who could not wait to get to the pub (but who never bought a round of drinks), while Tim Brooke-Taylor was often represented as willing to take any small performance job in his quiet career and always campaigning for repeats of The Goodies (something which Brooke-Taylor himself played upon in many rounds). Examples include Ignorance Is Bliss, Just a Minute, My Word! During a FACEBOOK home concert (May 19th 2020) Colin Sell confirms that he wrote the "signature tune" that plays on "the lovely Samantha." Samantha was the o. [13] On one occasion when Innes was guesting, Lyttelton outlined the musician's career, concluding that this "has brought him to where he is today: standing in for Colin Sell." ", "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Mailout 17.9.08", "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue Mailout 2009-02-20", "Episode 3, Series 65, I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue BBC Radio 4", "Episode 1, Series 65, I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue BBC Radio 4", "Brilliant time last night with Barry Cryer @TheRealJackDee @sanditoksvigMiles Jupp and a wonderful Southend audiences for @ISIHAClue", "Looking forward to joining the ISIHAC team at the Wycombe Swan Theatre next Monday 16th. "Celebrity What's My Line?" This round's going to be a hum-dinger! It's not every duck that becomes President. Another bumper collection of classic fun and games from the award-winning BBC Radio 4 comedy show. Lyttelton would describe Samantha's social activities, usually in an apology received from the unseen character who had been detained, often with a "gentleman friend". Excluding compilations and repeats, this totals 521 episodes (up to series 77). The official, authorised history of the show and ISIRTA, The Clue Bible by Jem Roberts, was published by Preface Publishing in October 2009. 'Risky, rude, brilliantly written and superbly performed' The Judges, Sony Radio Academy Award This second treasury contains over 30 hilarious editions of the awar d-winning 'antidote to panel games', first published as I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue Volumes 1 0 to 15, I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue . Test your knowledge of the rules and other interesting MC facts. ", "Backing will be provided, as ever, by Colin Sell at the piano. "[41] The final show of the 2008 Best of tour on 22 April would be presented by Rob Brydon. Samantha has to nip out now with her new gentleman friend. He claimed the secret was just to read what was in front of him without understanding why it was funny. The programme's scoring is completely non-existent. As popular today as when the show began in 1972, I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue is the emblem of joyfully smutty humour, filled with sniggers, innuendo and cheeky puns. She's been detained at the last minute in the city's Latin Quarter. Apparently, he's a vacuum cleaner salesman, and he's managed to get her the latest model. Some people still feel uncertain about all the rules of the game. Humphrey Lyttelton: The pioneering feminist, Emmeline Pankhurst, was born in Manchester. In ancient Egypt, they wrote unintelligible scribbles on walls and worshipped cats. Another bumper collection of classic fun and games from the award-winning BBC Radio 4 comedy show. Help keep Chortle viable. Samantha has got to go off early to meet an entymologist friend who's been showing her his collection of winged insects. Since then the panel has featured a variety of guest comedians. Colin Sell, a student of George Formby, Tom Lehrer, Flanders \u0026 Swann, Paddy Roberts and other light-hearted musical comedians, writes both memorable instrumentals AND funny novelty songs. A selection of my favourite efforts from the 'One Song to the Tune to Another' round from BBC Radio 4's I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue.Hosted by Humphrey Lyttelt. I even notice on my pack of breakfast sausages, there's a picture of Antony Worrall Thompson. You can imagine how things were livened up in that turkey abbatoir. The late Humphrey Lyttelton often delivered mock comments of how boring and low quality the show was and, particularly in his later years on the show, preferring to doze off rather than listen to the rounds. Guest pianists are called in when Sell has been unable to attend (or the ISIHAC team have "won the coin toss" as Lyttelton once said on the show), including Neil Innes, Denis King and Matthew Scott. However, Colin Sell now usually fills this role. Did you consider Samanthas feelings before reducing her to apunchline? [22] Cryer, Tim Brooke-Taylor and Graeme Garden all ruled themselves out as hosts: Cryer did not think the programme would work if a panellist became chairman and it "would need somebody of stature to be parachuted in". In practice, the seat and microphone were only used by the producer to welcome the audience, to introduce the participants and to give any other information to the audience such as the expected date of broadcasting, and to supervise re-recordings of fluffs made in the programme. Listen to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue: Hamish And Dougal Series 1 on Spotify. Graeme Garden and Barry Cryer frequently played the characters of two Scots, Hamish and Dougal, whose skits usually began with the phrase "You'll have had your tea? The other panellists are equally unhappy and may not continue if details of Samantha's wonderfully varied life can no longer be revealed. His comments included sexual innuendo and double entendres, like "Samantha likes nothing better than a little potter in the woodshed in the morning", though many were far more daring and explicit. [13] When Margaret Thatcher left office in 1990 Lyttelton introduced a scorer named Margaret. Harry sings Postman Pat to the tune of Climb Every Mountain from The Sound of Music. No. The long-running, self-styled antidote to panel games. " the man who put the C into rap music Colin Sell! Hot Podcasts. Something about old mens penises, I expect. He'll carefully take out her 38 bees and soon have them flying round his head. ", "The area has become even more of a tourist attraction. All quotes are by Humphrey Lyttelton unless otherwise stated. Humphrey Lyttelton: Listen, I'll tell you something. While the broadcast shows are recorded on location, this was the first ISIHAC touring stage show in the show's 35-year history. Lyttelton's band also appeared on a couple of Christmas specials. Jess 404 subscribers 330 Share 222K views 15 years ago RIP, Humphrey. Garden was again absent so Hardy took his place once more, with Tony Hawks as the guest panellist. Beeb ultimately deemed Samanthas antics appropriate. The client was so impressed, he threw in a mivvi and a choc ice as well. Ultimately, a complete archive (barring the opening music in places) was assembled, though the quality was somewhat poor for early episodes. He'll carefully take out her 38 bees. And how did that go? ), Samantha is the non-existent scorer on the epic long-running comedy panel show I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. He adopted the grumpy persona of someone who would really rather be somewhere else, which he attributed to worrying that, surrounded by four professional comedians, he would have nothing worthwhile to chip in. Mrs. Sell says it's the only thing that gets him up in the morning. I thought it was tinnitus. It was a relatively weak joke about sexual promiscuity. Samantha tells us she's off to a gourmet evening where her favourite French chef has prepared a nine course dinner. ", "Colin Sell is at the piano, and with exciting career news - he tells me that he's recently started to work with pop sensation Bjork, so now he's making regular trips to Iceland or if they're shut, he goes to Bejams. Introduced as "the antidote to panel games", it consists of two teams of two comedians "given silly things to do" by a chairman. Part of HuffPost Comedy. The chairman introduces the show with remarks such as: "Hello and welcome to I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue. Even now the authorities regularly uncover unstable cases carrying decaying material which have to be handled with the greatest of care. Most of the show is scripted, but in rounds such as "Sound charades", where one team of panellists have to guess the charade of the other team, the answer may be obvious (usually a pun) but the opposing team are not told the answer. Popular shows today . [scoffs] Something wrong there. ", "Dear Rolf: They say a dog isn't just for Christmas. (modern). ", "Lewis Carroll started his journeys to China from Sunderland. [51], The eighth tour took place in 2017, again with Dee in the chair. ", Barry Cryer: "You've been turning this back, you little clock-teaser! Certainly I don't envisage us selecting anyone on a permanent basis for several series. In another appearance Innes sang along to his own composition "I'm the Urban Spaceman" during a round of "Pick Up Song". Humphrey Lyttelton: Samantha nearly made it. The top 20 shows as judged by the panel. This grew out of the "drama" section of later shows in the I'm Sorry, I'll Read That Again series, for example, at the Criminals' Ball, "Mr and Mrs Knee, and their Swedish son, Lars Knee". ", "The sound effects were acquired for us from the BBC archives by the lovely Samantha. ", "This musical lament will be accompanied by Colin Selland music doesn't come more lamentable than that. Incidentally, we've just heard some great news - I'm very pleased to announce that the BBC have arranged a special collection of Colin's entire work they've bagged it up, & the council are sending some men round for it on Tuesday. The five funniest games from I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue Hilarious, embarrassing, and bizarre challenges set by the chairman, Jack Dee. Orbison, of course, was nicknamed 'The Big O', and in turn, he affectionately referred to Colin as 'That Little C'", "Piano accompaniment will be provided by Colin Sell, who tells me that his musical influences are Middle-Eastern in origin mostly Shi'ite!". "[37] This story became a favourite of Lyttelton's, who claimed in interviews that the "distinguished actor" had never actually been named on the show.[38]. He's been phoning her constantly, angrily demanding a visit. But then, TV arrived. In the Clue mailout for September 2008 Naismith stated: "Despite the rumours, we've made no decisions about possible replacements for Humph, and are unlikely to make any decisions this year at least. [19], Raymond Baxter was occasionally drafted to commentate on sessions of Mornington Crescent and also presented the one-off special Everyman's Guide to Mornington Crescent. The complainant gave it agood shot, railing against her perception of the series as a male dominated (boys-club) environment, claiming that the BBC had failed to keep abreast of changing social attitudes and values relating to the non-acceptability of sexist humour and the sexual objectification of women, and even quoting a United Nations special rapporteur on Violence Against Women. He's been phoning her constantly, angrily demanding a visit. Clue has been broadcast since 11 April 1972 on BBC Radio 4 with new series rotating with the other Monday night comedy staples such as The Unbelievable Truth, The Museum Of Curiosity and Just a Minute. ", "Samantha was telling us before the show she's been visiting a nice gentleman racehorse owner in his stables recently. In 1965 Round The Horne was launched, and gentle smut was liberally applied over every episode. Samantha says he's keen to lay her up in the Orkneys", "Samantha has to nip out now to spend time with her new gentleman friend. And let's face it, if the show ever got canned we'd not only lose the lovely Samantha and the talents of all the great panellists over the years, be losing a whole history of comedy gems. Despite the complainants repeated appeals, the Beeb ultimately deemed Samanthas antics appropriate because she wasaskit on both the misogynist and sexist programmes which were predominantly popular some years ago and the attitudes that led to them which still exist today. Regardless of one's smug-tolerance levels, who in their right mind can object to any of the following? The 50th series was broadcast in November and December 2007. It's a bastion of Britishness; a quirky, eccentric, wonderful piece of radio that injects joy and happiness into the lives of 2.5 million Brits each week - and it has being going since 1972. It once made a blind man deaf. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue Treasury Classic BBC Radio Comedy By: BBC Radio Comedy Narrated by: Humphrey Lyttleton, Barry Cryer, Graeme Garden Length: 18 hrs and 38 mins 4.8 (56 ratings) Try for $0.00 Pick 1 title (2 titles for Prime members) from our collection of bestsellers and new releases. (November 2006), "In her spare time, Samantha likes nothing more than to peruse old record shops. He's performed the latter quite often over the years in UK evenings with Barry Cryer. ", "You join us again at the Everyman Theatre in Cheltenham, where we've attracted a capacity audience of some 700, odd people. Let's move on. It all started with an iconic wartime show called 'It's That Man Again' or. or "Do you kill people for money? After fifty years on the air, one of the most important aspects of the show is its huge stock of running gags which, if not always funny in themselves, can elicit huge anticipatory laughter from the studio audience. From George W. Bush: Yo Blair You got it wrong. [16][17] He read the script introducing the programme and segments in an utterly deadpan manner. Only we can truly understand the humour of a fictional 'game' based on the London Underground called Mornington Crescent. Another episode sees the team play Mornington Crescent alongside with a computer, which, like Jeremy Hardy and the Sat Nav, falls in love with Stephen Fry ("Stevie baby!") before malfunctioning slightly near the end of the round ("Knight to bishop four!"). Today's crossword puzzle clue is a general knowledge one: Fictional scorer on the radio show I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue. Born in 1972, it was something of a continuation of the Sketch Show I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again (which was also the origin of Monty Python's Flying Circus and The Goodies). I should lodge a complaint. Following the death of Humphrey Lyttelton in 2008, the show used regular guest panellists Stephen Fry, Jack Dee and Rob Brydon as guest presenters for the 51st series, before choosing Jack Dee as the permanent chairman the following series. They've already covered his bees and wasps and tonight she's hoping to go through his flies. "", "Incidentally, Colin's first TV appearance was when he played the mouth organ in Black Lace. "Dear Mr. Gadaffi, You must be very proud. This collection finds unflappable chairman Humphrey Lyttelton giving silly things to do to regular panelists Tim Brooke-Taylor, Barry Cryer and Graeme Garden, as well as special guests Stephen Fry and Rob Brydon. [citation needed], The pilot episode (at that time titled I'm Sorry, They're At It Again) opened with Graeme Garden and Jo Kendall singing the words of "Three Blind Mice" to the tune of "Ol' Man River" followed by Bill Oddie and Tim Brooke-Taylor performing the lyrics of "Sing a Song of Sixpence" to the melody of "These Foolish Things". Jack Dee who took over from the legendary Humphrey Lyttleton as host in 2009 has threatened to quit the show. I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue (BBC Radio 4, 11 April 1972 - ) is a British radio comedy programme which describes itself as "the antidote to panel games ".

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